Cannonball Run

Let's get one thing straight. This story is about speed. No holds barred, flat knacker, knuckle-whitening speed. And just how exhilarating it is to hold a dirty big motorcycle on the throttle stop for extended periods. Legally.

Yep, without fear of spending a goodly portion of the remainder of your finite existence as a guest of that old pommy broad with the crook fashion sense and dysfunctional family.

Given that those charged with running our lives suggest that "speed kills" anywhere, anytime, and subsequent of my week in the Northern Territory aboard a brace of BMW's K Series supersonicary, I must be dead. Or our legislators are clearly wrong. Which do you think is the case?

Right. Let's start at the start. Some background. Following a discussion with Ged Bulmer who holds the position of editor of sister magazine Wheels, a scheme was devised to travel to the North with the hottest production machinery BMW could muster. A top-speed run from Darwin to Alice seemed in order and the good folk at BMW concurred. You see, much of the Northern Territory features an unrestricted speed set-up. Yep, as fast as you bleedin'-well like. Lovely.

The resultant collection of assembled hardware was pretty impressive. Cop these apples: The car side of the exercise was catered for by a 3.2 litre straight six M3 SMG coupe, a 5.0 litre V8 M5 sedan and a 4.6 litre V8 X5 4WD wagon. Absolute top-end kit.

Bikes? Well, a couple of K 1200GT's and a K 1200RS got the nod. Big, relatively heavy, and stable, they were to prove perfect for ballistic speeds and long stints.

THE LONG AND STRAIGHT ROAD

The planned route set out by BMW honcho and high-speed aficionado John Kananghinis was simple. Start in Darwin, belt down to Katherine, then embark on a big, fast day to cover the 1158km to Alice Springs. The next day would see the travelling high-speed circus make the trip to Uluru and then back to Alice.

The distance from Darwin to Katherine is around 200km. Fortunately there is fuel available fairly freely on this leg of the journey. You see we'd learned the hard way that a BMW K12 will get rid of its full fuel load of 20.5 litres in around 170km at full noise. For the mathematically-minded amongst us, that's drinking the go-fluid at 8.2km to the litre. Serious juice-use is the short analysis.

Now, generally, using lots of fuel on road tests doesn't matter. That's what it's for after all. It can become a little more complicated however when fuel stops are tantalisingly placed just outside that aforementioned 170km range. Yep, on more than one occasion we found ourselves with tanks as dry as a dead dingo's donger. And I can vouch for the veracity of all that oft-quoted dryness because examples of parched ex-wildlife were well-represented on this trip...

So, we had to be somewhat circumspect. Wheels road tester Bill McKinnon and myself found ourselves forced to govern our speed at times to 200km/h. We worked out you could get around 200km out of a tank at that speed and that would be enough to see us able to fuel when required.

GENTLEMEN, START YOUR ENGINES

After getting out of the Darwin environs we encountered the first of those derestriction signs. You know, like the one in the accompanying picture. They appear well on the outskirts of towns and you are usually warned well in advance by signs saying "80 Ahead", followed by the speed limit sign.

Sounds easy doesn't it? Well, when you are not used to it, it's not.

You see you really need to dial into high-speed running. Everything is different at around 200km/h plus. The bike behaves differently in most aspects. Things like closing speed.

Until you have sat on a big speed for an extended period it is highly unlikely that you will have a handle on how quickly you come up on oncoming traffic.

Want some proof? Well, did you know that the combined closing speed of a bike travelling at 240km/h and another vehicle travelling at 130km/h is 101.8 metres per second!?

Like that? Well, what about this then... At the above speeds the rider will have covered 99.75 metres before he/she has had time to even begin braking and the other vehicle will have covered 54.15 metres before he/she has begun braking (based on a 1.5 second reaction time). That's just less than 154 metres covered before you even start to retard forward progress. Yep, you need to pay attention...

All this means on those straight and well-surfaced roads is that you really have to plan and you cannot relax. I'm not saying it takes a special skill, (in fact it's a lot of fun) but it just means that you are constantly operating in a state of high awareness and your energy levels are all-important. Breaks are necessary, but this is usually taken care of by the aforementioned regular need for fuel and, with an average speed of around 200km/h and around 200km available per tank (even my mathematically-challenged brain can deal with that), you are stopping every hour. The go is to bung down a chocolate bar and have a bit of a wander about. Smoke 'em if you've got 'em...

BIG COUNTRY, BIG BIKE

Regular readers will know that the AMT long-term stable has housed a navy blue K 1200GT during the second half of 2003. We've commuted on it, toured on it, used it two-up... 'Why not give one buggery at top speed in the NT' we thought. Seems to make perfect sense to me. So how does the big bugger stand up?

Well, pretty well. Fact is this is not sports bike and (as I said after my launch test back in AMT #142, June 2003) it is a big comfy mile-eater that is designed to sit between the K 1200RS and the K 1200LT. It is only just a sports tourer. It will never give things like the VFR800 or Triumph Sprint ST a run for their money on a winding mountain pass, but it has a muscley turn of speed from its 130PS and 11.9kg-m of torque. Toss in the fact that you will arrive warm, dry and without rheumatoid arthritis and the bike endears itself.

It's no Twiggy at 281kg (dry) and the dimensions and geometry are such that the bike is built for stability rather than agility. As such, it's just about the perfect jigger for a ballistic run through Australia's middle. Yeehaaa...

THROTTLE UP

On the run from Katherine to Alice (a distance of 1158km which we optimistically planned to cover in a day), it was time to get serious. Mum and Dad seemed to be everywhere in their campervans and caravans and not many were taking advantage of the lack of speed limits. Silly old sausages.

This of course meant spending a lot of time on the opposite side of the road, with passing manoeuvres taking some pre-planning. Good thing is you are not out there long with the trundling tourist juggernauts quickly disappearing in the big K's mirrors. This is one time that "objects in mirrors are NOT closer than they appear". Well, not for long anyway.

The bike comes equipped at standard with cruise control. I tried to set it for 245km/h (the top speed I could get out of the GT) but it would not set above 180km/h. Probably a good thing...

At that speed, tiny bends in the road become full-on corners and entry is critical. You get a handle on this pretty quickly and it really is a huge rush to whack the bike on its side and track effortlessly through a bend at full-noise. It's a feeling I'll never forget.

Another feeling I will never forget is passing a cop car flat knacker. Even though I knew I was legal, even though they see this all the time, I still backed off and thought about it when the Hi-Lux-canopy-thingy with the coloured lights hove into view. I talked myself into it with a train of thought that went something like 'this is a once in a lifetime opportunity Snag and the boys would expect nothing less'. Hence the right hand was twisted into almost deformity as I lined up the police car and swept around it with jet-like speed. Jeez it was grouse, and they gave us a wave at the next fuel stop into the bargain!

GENTLY BENTLEY...

I spent most of the high-speed stuff at around 200km/h. Flat out speeds were a little unsettling for long periods, where 200 seemed like a happy cruise, and, believe it or not, it was nice to have some acceleration at your fingertips. Sounds strange, but it is a little disconcerting to not have go at hand, so both Bill and I settled into the double ton comfortably.

Did I mention that we had Glenn Ridge and a film crew from The Car Show with us? Well, we did and it was fascinating to watch how they go about their business. Downside meant they we were way behind schedule and it was decided as the sun got low in the sky to put the bikes on a trailer for the final run into Alice. Call me a pussy if you like, but lots and lots of big things that have parents come out to play when dark sets in up there and we had the run from Alice to Uluru and back to complete the next day.

Upside here was I got the chance to drive the M5 for a while and it is simply breath-taking. It takes a lot of car to excite a motorcyclist in the go stakes, but this thing is a weapon. That scream of 5.0 litre Bavarian bent eight at 6000rpm (it still has another 500 to go before redline!) and an indicated 265km/h will live with me forever. Toss in the fact that we had a conversation without rasing our voices at that speed and it all becomes a little surreal. It is an amazing motor car.

A TOWN CALLED ALICE

So the travelling road show bowled into Alice Springs at 9.30pm. Yep, you're right. Exactly beer o'clock. How does that always happen?

As indicated, the next day saw us ride the unrestricted section of 201km to the Eridunda Roadhouse from which the road is speed-restricted the remaining 242km to Uluru.

This for me was the highlight of the ride. The unrestricted section was beautifully-surfaced and carried far less traffic than we'd experienced on the run from Katherine to Alice. As such, we gave the bikes their heads and experienced fully why this is one of the 'must-dos' of touring motorcycling. Carving an ultra-high-speed swathe through desolate, yet beautiful landscape is almost romantic. Yeah, righto, I'll stop right there. Just do it. You'll see what I mean.

The run into the Rock was slow due to the speed restriction, but it gave me time to take in the barren beauty of the middle and, because this was my first time to Uluru, I marvelled at the Rock itself. I'd been told that you can't imagine it until you've seen it and it's true. It looks like the postcards (well it would wouldn't it), but it just keeps getting bigger, until it overwhelms you. Brilliant.

The trip back into Alice saw w pilot the SMG M3. This thing just feels like a racing car. More skittish at super-speed, it comes equipped with paddles either side of the wheel for gearchanging. It's real drivers' car and the thing will pull 270km/h. Wow.

BACK TO REALITY...

So, there you have it. There are very few places that you can do this sort of thing. I'm told Montana in the USA has an 'on-off' attitude to derestriction, parts of Africa and Asia will allow it, but surfaces and traffic won't and there are Autobahns in Germany where you can go ballistic. But they are motorways aren't they?

For real-world, desolate, man/woman and machine road-romance, this is as good as it gets. I'll never forget it.