Aussie riders pride themselves on their outback spirit. Pounding dirt roads and gravel tracks is what we do best – at least in our dreams.
If you do go bush, the chances of a bingle are higher than usual. In most cases, it ends in dented pride and scuffed plastic – but sometimes bits get broken. If it’s bones, then you need a mobile phone or PLB (Personal Locator Beacon). If it’s your bike that’s taken a hit then you can either walk home, or try to fix it. Here’s a few bush repair tips to help weasel out of the most common breakages.
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When you pile it, the brake and clutch levers always get it. If they snap off rather than just bend, you are in trouble. Some levers have a machined-in weak point so they don’t completely snap off, but many don’t and you end up with a tiny stub of alloy, and nothing to front brake or change gears with.
Easy fix: a pair of small-size mole grips (aka vise grips, or locking pliers). Get the ones with parallel jaws, not the nut-gripping sort. Do them up as tight as you can on the stub of the lever, then brake or change gear as seldom as possible, and you should get home.
Back brake and gear levers can also take a hit. This time use the nut-grip mole grips and clamp on the base of the spindle. Again, take it easy on usage and you will get there.
The problem with foot levers, is that they often bend in (or out), rather than snap off. If it’s in, there’s another problem: a hole in the crankcase; exit oil; end of expedition. If this happens, all is still not lost.
Lie the bike down on its side to keep the remaining oil inside. Scrape around the hole/crack with your Leatherman or Swiss Army knife so the metal is totally raw (don’t use sandpaper as filings can get inside the engine).
Grab that pack of Selley’s Knead It from your tool roll, squish it up and layer it over the hole/crack. Use a bit of cardboard or paper to cover the hole under the paste if it’s a big one. Leave for 20mins, then ride off. It really works.
This fix can be applied if a rock smashes up under the base of the engine too, but you need to work fast to stop the remaining oil leaking out.
The next most common problem, again thanks to rocks, is a holed radiator. The quick and easy fix is pepper (sawdust works too). Open the radiator filler cap, pour in a few packets of pepper (or sawdust), then run the engine slowly. The dust will get pumped round, try to leak out through the hole and fill the gap. It might still leak a bit, but should get you home.
If you don’t like the idea of edible matter inside your engine, a can of Permatex leak-repair spray can help. You just spray on the leak and it hardens and seals it – but it won’t work if there is any internal pressure, or if everything is covered in crap.
If it’s a cooling hose that has been split, duct tape can work wonders. Wrap, wrap, and wrap some more using drink bottle plastic or coke-can metal to strengthen the repair.
Sometimes, just to make things difficult, the throttle cable snaps. If it’s a carby bike, just speed up the idle as fast as it will go then use the clutch to control speed and gears.
If it’s a fuel-injected bike, pull out the cable and strip back the outer from the ‘pull’ cable until a reasonable length of inner is showing. Tie a knot in the end, slip a cable tie or two through it, then use your thumb to work it like Mick Doohan did.
There are stories old bold bikers filling their tyres with grass when the tube was completely shagged, but I have yet to see a real-life example.
If you have cable ties and duct tape, strap the tyre as tight as you can to the rim and ride (very slowly) home. It’s probably quicker and you’ll have to replace the tyre either way. Just go easy on the rims.
The alternative is to use duct tape and plastic on the tube itself, if you can get to it, and the tyre as well. It will leak for sure, but might be better than nothing as long as you pump it regularly.
Here’s a tip that most don’t twig to. If you have to abandon your bike somewhere in woop-woop, chain it and lock it to a solid tree. Those dodgy blokes in that old ute you saw a way back will throw it in the back and fix it up at their leisure if you don’t.
This article was originally published on December 15, 2021.